Tuesday, 26 June 2012

Hotspots for the Infertile

You can fall in love at first sight with a place as with a person. ~Alec Waugh

Rudnik - The Twin Town

Picture source: Timesofmalta

A tiny village, located at the south-east Bulgaria, is famous for their twin family everywhere. Although the multiple birth resulted from IVF is popular in Bulgaria, the locals in Rudnik insisted that they conceived the twin family naturally. They believed that the water in Rudnik is very 'natural' to meet the fertilization thus improve fertility among local women. Some academicians viewed that this possibility is because of the water in Rudnik and its good elements while some academicians stated that this happened just because of hereditary. (Source: Link 1, Link 2)

Kodinhi, Kerala India - A Wonder Land of Twin

Picture source:Groups Yahoo

There is still mystery to the expert to the miraculous twin village of Kodinhi (in Malapuram district) in Kerala. There are 220 sets of twin registered in Kodinhi but the doctor believes it is more than 350 sets of twin in Kodinhi. The riddle growing stronger when every year the twins delievered is increasing for the past 10 years. The expert believes that this happen because of their water. Although India is the lowest twin rate, but Kodinhi is the highest twin rate in the world. There are a lot mystery unsolved such as the height of the mother. In medical research, the height of the mother to carry the twin should be about 5ft3inc while average of Kodinhi women is 5ft. Another factor of twinning pregnancy is the age of the mother, which most of the twin mother are mature women while Kodinhi women is just 18-20 years old when delivering their twin. (Source: Link 1, Link 2)

Australian Outback, Kununurra, Australia - The Fertility Water

Picture source:Jessicast

Nicole Kidman claimed that the fertility water in Kununurra had helped her pregnant, together with other six women who swam in the same water during the production of the film "Australia" (hero: Hugh Jackman). She claimed that there were 7 babies conceived and out of it, one is a baby boy. The claimed has invited so many infertile woman to go to the location.

(Source: Link 1, Link 2)

Lake of the Pregnant Maiden, Langkawi, Malaysia - The fertility lake

This is a well-known lake in Langkawi with its legend which is said to help the infertile and barren woman to increase their fertility in order to conceive. The legends tell that the princess named Dayang Sari buried her first child in the lake, hence the special power of the lake to boost fertility. This lake also resembling the laid down pregnant woman.  (Source: Link 1, Link 2)

African Fertility Statue from Ivory Coast, at Ripley's office in Florida.

This five foot statue made from wood, carved by Baule tribesman in 1930s. This statue represent a king holding a sword and mango while the queen holding infant, which indicate the fertility symbol. According to the legend, the statue should be located before the bedroom and the couple who wish to conceive touch the statue before they went to bed. Within a year in Ripley's office, 13 staffs and visitors were pregnant after touching the statue. In their world-tour in the late 90s, the Ripleys received over than 2000 letters from women stating that they are pregnant after touching the statue, although some of them are diagnosed barren by the doctors. I also used to read that one of the Ripley's staff were pregnant after she hold the statue to move it to the Ripley's truck, although she was in birth control. (Source: Link 1, Link 2)

B&C: Now, book your flight ticket to Bulgaria, India, Australia, Langkawi and Florida. Hmm..?

Saturday, 23 June 2012

You are kind, makcik

Apology is a lovely perfume; it can transform the clumsiest moment into a gracious gift. ~Margaret Lee Runbeck

Date: May 29

I followed my husband to the workshop. I sat there for freaking 5 hours from 11am to 4pm. At 2pm, there was a family- a husband, a wife carrying a baby, 4 children and one old citizen (I think the husband is her son-I called her makcik). They sat next to me and the makcik actually a friendly person.

We talked and conversed on some things but always distracted with her yelling to the hyperactive toddler who loves to wander in the workshop in curiosity. The toddler is the brother of the baby, means dia adalah anak ke4.

The makcik kept scolding him and I made remarks,
"Dia ni comel. Ikut muka bapak dia."
"Dia ni..Nakal dia ni..hm..dah berapa lama kat workshop ni?" Makcik asked me.
I replied, "Dari pukul 11 tadi."
"Lamanya..Tinggai mana?"
"Jauh. Bukan orang sini."
"La ni duduk umah sapa?"
"Rumah mertua."
"Anak dah berapa?"
"Tak ada anak."

The makcik was silent for seconds and said to me, "Minta maaf la makcik bertanya tadi ya.."
"Tak mengapa."

The conversation ends because the daddy want to have a lunch with the family at the nearest small restaurant.

Frankly I was happy. I'm not happy because I'm childless but I was touched by the politeness of this makcik who asked for an apology, for asking that 'sensitive' question. And she know it is sensitive thing and it will be sensitive.

You see, the makcik I believe have no tertiary education like our generation, live moderately with shoddy garments and wore cheap hijab, ride an old car with her son & the family but very rich in politeness, classy manners and civilized behaviour. It is very contrast with our generation, who earned well-respected degrees, live in so-called modernism but poor in budi bahasa by asking stupid question and give nasty remarks on our inability to procreate.

Inconsiderate breeders, do you have no shame with this makcik?

Friday, 22 June 2012

I am insincerely 'thrilled' with your 'mundane' news

To speak and to speak well are two things. A fool may talk, but a wise man speaks. 
~Ben Jonson

Date: May 28, 2012

*I've told you that this week is the revulsion week. So bear with me je la ya.*

My despicable biras (I used to write about her in here and here) announcing her 3rd pregnancy on Facebook. I read it but neither commenting on the update nor congratulate her. In other words, I pretended that I'm not active in Facebook. I told my husband about that 'mundane' news and her plan to go back to kampung which apparently at the same date as ours.

Exactly as I anticipated, she kept talking about her pregnancy and weird morning sickness. It started like this.

My husband telling my sister-in-law (SIL) that she looked chubby. The SIL just smiling and confirmed her weight gain. But this despicable biras suddenly interupted and said to my husband, "Eh, kami berisi2 pun ada isi tau. Kami ni tengah alahan ni, alahan tak boleh masak."

We weren't astonished much but we just kept silent. I asked her question to get rid from the awkwardness , "Dua-dua ni due bila..?". In exuberance, she replied, "akak bulan 12, dia (SIL) bulan 10.."..So I said, "Eh eh, sama macam yang dulu.." (Her 2nd child and my SIL's 1st child is in same age)

I assisted my mother-in-law (MIL) cooking breakfast. In the midst of cooking, the despicable biras and the SIL brought their plate with the right hand and pinched their nose with their left hand, coming to the kitchen seeing us cooking. I just ignored it (sebab malas nak layan), but my MIL thought it was hillarious and asked me to look at them. I just said, "Oh kesiannya. Sekejap ya." and continued my cooking.

It didn't stop here. When I read the newspaper at the living hall, in front of me and my husband, the biras intentionally asking the SIL, "sabun siapa yang dalam bilik air tu ha...bau dia...loya la..".. My SIL just shrugged.

And that's actually her introductory humdrum explanation about the pregnancy. She looked at me and explained unsolicitedly, "Akak pregnant kali ni teruk..loya sangat..yang no.1 dengan no.2 tu okay je.."
"Oh ya ke.." Sambil tu I flipped the newspaper just to indicate that I want to read the newspaper and her story about her pregnancy is not my concern and so damn boring.
But dia sambung lagi.."Akak sebenarnya tak bajet pun nak ngandung..tak sangka dapat..Husband cakap kalau dah nak lekat tu nak buat camana..Ingat dah dapat sepasang ni cukup la..Lagipun kan akak dua-dua operate. Doktor cakap, kalau operate lagi, luka akan bertambah pedih sebab potong di tempat yang sama.."
"Operate berapa kali yang boleh?"
"Doktor kata empat.."
"Ooh..boleh la lagi satu.."
She smiled. "Akak ni check pun bila dah 11 hari lewat period.."

SIL yang dari tadi kept silent  interrupted, " Saya dah dua bulan tak period baru check..sebab takut..Ingat kali ni nak lelaki tapi husband suka perempuan..Kalau dapat lelaki kali ni, saya dah tak nak lagi dah.."

I said, "Kawan akak yang dah dapat sepasang pun kata dia dah tak nak lagi..Napa ek mak-mak bila dapat sepassang dah tak nak lagi?"

They were haywired for seconds but SIL answered, "Entahlah..boleh bawak bergaduh kot..".
(I think they want to say "I feel complete as a woman if I can give birth son and daughter."--like previous entry but maybe they afraid I will be offended -- or maybe this is just only my assumption)

I continued reading newspaper.

Wait. The story not finish yet.

When I and husband went to bed, my husband reported to me in sotyo voce that the despicable biras asked my husband (without my presence and my knowledge). "Si B&C tu tak ada isi lagi ke?
"Isi? Isi apa?" My husband asked her back.
"Ala..isi la.."
"Tak..tak..kitaorang tak nak lagi..sebab nanti tiket flight mahal."

I asked my husband how she responded with the answer. Hubby said she just kept silent and no other stupid blabbering. (The flight ticket mahal because we have to take flight to go back to our hometown)

I was furious and pissed off with what happened. I have this determination that if I'm pregnant, she will be the last person to know, and if she asked me why I'm not informing or announcing my pregnancy, I will tell her, "My husband tak bagi bising-bising pasal pregnant, dia kata macam perangai orang low-class!" ..Ahaha..berangan je la..mengandungnya entah bila.

Oh despicable biras, nanti dah beranak pinak dan agak-agak sesak duit nak balik kampung atau nak raya, tak payahlah nak pinjam duit kami lagi ya. Hutang haritu pun tak bayar.

Thursday, 21 June 2012

Oh ya? Padan muka!

Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power. ~P.J. O'Rourke

I read about the 'firing things' from HoneyLily in her blog. I believe that in this infertility issue, sometimes we have to fight alone. Sometimes we have to put aside our dogmatism of being a good and nice person sebab we always been insulted, sneered, mocked and teased in a humiliated way. I never 'firing' verbally to anybody until I stumbled upon with the detestable Budak Semut Bodoh. Remember about this Budak Semut Bodoh?

She is pregnant.

 About four months ago, I stumbled upon with her at the airport and I frankly pretended that I didn't noticed her. She in fact approached me, greeted me, saying she miss me so much and telling me that I am so arrogant for not contacting her. (Huh, memang tak ingin pun..!)

She told me in annoying excitement that she is pregnant. Before I said anything, she rubbed her hand on my belly and asked me if I have a bun in the oven. Of course not! (My mistake, i wore a bit tight shirt yang made me look rather chubby).

I asked what months her pregnancy is. She telling me the pregnancy is about 2 months and whining that she have a tough morning sickness. I replied to her, "Oh ya? Padan muka!"

She don't want to prolong the conversation and excused herself. I, in contra felt the joy of saying bad things to her. I mean, instead of having guilt with my saying, I feel good and it's like saying those rude words released all my vengeance and my hatred toward her into the air at the airport.

You may think that I am so mean. But before you judged me in that way, please read why and how she treated me.

Budak Semut Bodoh, may your child stupid like you. (Not my real du'a, just my evil thought).

Tuesday, 19 June 2012

You think you're complete.So what?

You can be sincere and still be stupid. ~Charles F. Kettering

Date: May 13, 2012
Time: 1518

I have a bossy friend let say her name is Rui. Rui is an Asian (she is not Malaysian, but I don't want to write her citizenship in exact) and we met at campus. We were a good friend but her bossiness took me away for a while. However she kept chasing me and telling everyone I'm her friend. It's not that I'm not appreciate our friendship but I think it is just so damn stress have a friend like her. While I accepted it in so-so, I never thought that our friendship will be longer until now.

It is not her citizenship or her aristocrasy that I always want to withdrawn with her, but it is about her always downgrading and looking down to me (and to others). While I have an excuse for not seeing her, she will make 100 reasons why I should see her..Haha..but deep in my heart, I miss our time, I love our friendship but I just want her to have some respect.

Currently, she kept bugging me to see her, to show her children. When I said I am busy and have a time constraint she replied, "Oh you have so much time to go for vacation..". That was also what she always did back then. No respect. But I was astonished by her unchanged attitude despite her title as a mommy of two.

Yesterday she rang me and said she wanna come to my home but my husband asked me not to accept it because we had other plan.

Suddenly, she asked me about family planning.
"Are you in family planning?"
I replied, but not to prolonged the conversation I said, "Maybe"
"Sampai bila kau nak planning? Umur kau kan dah tua.."
"Entah. Kau pula bila nak tambah? Macam senang je kau beranak. Tambah la lagi.." (with chuckle)
"Eh kau ni, kau lah beranak.Kau kan dah lama kahwin. Aku dah dapat sepasang ni aku dah rasa lengkap.."


"Kau nak tunggu sampai bila lagi..? Kalau dah 30 tahun nanti kau pregnant, nanti risky la.."


I chit-chatted with her for minutes, and she told me after that, "......that's why I want to bring my children, I want to show them to you..I want to introduce you to them..."


The conversation ended after some updates and gossips, so after I hang up, I told my husband about the conversation 'of being complete' thing...He respond nothing but making face like this (:-I ) *protruding lips*

Depsite my Zupp!! feeling, I think I have some soft spot when she told me she want to introduce me to her children. But what the heck, her children kecil lagi boleh ke capture memory about my look..? Hahaha..Sungguh vain ini B&C..

I pray if I have children, I will not acting like inconsiderate stupid dumb bunny arse breeders!

This also my revulsion. Thank you.

Monday, 18 June 2012

Tok Guru la konon.Wekk!

An inability to stay quiet is one of the most conspicuous failings of mankind.
~Walter Bagehot

Back to blogging world. Hei there!

I may not write in this blog often but I love to read and write so I keep my private journal in my phone via an apps. Being a busy bee hinder me to update but today I have a good empty mind so I decide to transfer my writing in my journal into this blog. So, my notes here is backdated (which I will put the date) unless I say so.

I know my writings in this week will invites the negative vibes so I don't mind if you are not agree with my opinion or you don't want to read it, hence no remarks. Frankly I don't mind.


Date: May 12, 2012
Time: 1302

I am pissed off with my husband's friend. Let say his name is Mr Kampong. Not that I downgrading the sub-urban people (since I and husband was born in sub-urban area) but because I sneered him on his inability to be considerate educated people albeit he act as he is the most mature one in his circles of friends. He always give unsolicited advice and unwelcome opinion about life, about partnership between husband and wife, about being a parents, about being a good people and so on. Wekkk!

I know he want us to follow his suit but my husband and I didn't take him as our exemplary figure let alone asking for advice like some others did. that's why they called him "Tok Guru".  And he kept teasing my husband (as it is part of the joke and sometimes making controversial statement like "my wife is fat like a pear")in order to provoke my husband to give the same statements. We on the other hand never entertained his joke or asking advice although his statement is much provocative. Whenever he did making provocative statement, my husband just smile and he not satisfy when we didn't talk much about our life to him. In other words, we never talk about our problem or our stories at home to others including this Mr Kampong. In indirect way, he sneered and making jokes to my husband for being nice to me, as he believed that I am the queen control. My husband, replied that it is a Sunnah for a husband to be nice to his wife. Dia terkena lepas tu terdiam. There are a lot of similar kind of conversations, as if we are wrong because we are not like other husband and wife. Most of the time, my husband kenakan dia balik dan dia terdiam, paling2 pun buat2 gelak konon making jokes. He also used to touch my husband's hand and konon-kononnya 'menurun' la jadi psikik yang boleh tahu hal peribadi. He said that my husband make a money but the spending is all on his family. Memanglah, masa tu I unemployed. Memang la burden is on my husband. Ingat aku nak percaya psikik dan 'menurun' kau tu. Tuuiii! (I spit to him, not to you readers..haha). Oh panjangnya perihal Mr Kampong yang dibenci ini.

One of the thing that made me went berserk was when he told my husband a story of his infertile relative. He narrated that the wife is like a menantu derhaka, not being nice to her mother in law until she passed away. Before the mother in law died in a hospital, the wife asked her husband to go back to their home although the husband's mother was dying. The husband though followed his wife but the mother in law can't resisted to say, "celaka punya menantu..!" and she died.

Konon-konon, as a punishment, the wife is infertile for 8 years.

My husband just kept quiet after the narration but he told me that he cannot accept one-side story. Maybe the mother in law is so mean like Monster In Law (film by Jennifer Lopez and Jane Fonda i guess) to the wife to extent the wife loathes her..

My heart broke into pieces listening to the story, as he was (I assume) sarcastically said that I am the mischievous daughter in law and that's why I'm not pregnant.

I can accept his sarcatism toward us, be it I'm gaining weight, or our attitude toward each other (may not conventional like him and his wife), or I'm not working permanently, or my garments and my hijab (he think that I flaunt much) or my still-on-going unfinished study, but this thing hurt me most.

Sometimes I'm hoping that he will having problem in educating his children, particularly when his wife doesn't want to follow him to his hometown / even short excursion of balik kampung is a public knowledge among us here. I think it is just very inconsiderate of him making joke about life, due to our independent life and we never seek advice from him like others always did. Tok Guru konon, ajar la bini sendiri sebelum nak ajar orang.

Sometimes people are weird. And jealous. And inferior. And stupid.

This is only my revulsion. Thank you.

Saturday, 16 June 2012

Putting some efforts but no rizq

Many people think they want things, but they don't really have the strength, the discipline. They are weak. I believe that you get what you want if you want it badly enough. 
~Sophia Loren

My mother keep telling me the story of a motherhood joyness, the advantages of having children, the euphoria watching the kids growing up and so many more.

So one moment I asked her if it is okay if I'm being childfree. She (I think) went ballistic, partly shocked if it is my permanent decision. Hm...her story about motherhood and having zuriat became longer and in tense. I was tried to explain to her but she mocking me sarcastically about my liking to fashion and beauty, and my interest in living in a modern lifestyle including my plan to pursue to a higher level of education. She also telling me in twisted sentence somehow means, 'a woman is useless if she's not bear a child even she is a beauty queen'. I don't mean that I am beautiful here but my liking to dress to the nine is public knowledge to my family and my family in law. She thought that I don't want children because I'm so full of myself being a young forever and to preserve my youthfulness.

She also making statement than man can marry other woman to get zuriat so I should beware. I argued at the beginning of her 'lecture' but I restrained myself to kept silent so that we'll not fight.

Am I inspired? Partly.

But I don't like her forecasting of me being childless even it is true. The forecasting like "baik beranak, nanti laki cari lain." or "tak beranak, kesian, husband mesti sedih tu..nanti tambah cawangan la nanti tu" by people is so mean and thoughtless.  She asked me to put extra efforts like others did, like daughters/sons of her friends.  Apparently the MIL of comedian Nabil is one of her friend and Nabil's wife had seen the tukang urut (formerly bidan) in our viccinity. The Nabil's MIL suggested to my mum to bring me to this tukang urut. The tukang urut have no active handphone so mum called her other friends to know if the tukang urut is available. The tukang urut was available that day however she was diagnosed with heart disease the day before. I was nearly to get dress to go to her house but cancelled the plan because I don't want any risk of heart attack while she massaging me. Mampus aku kena saman kang!

Afterwards, another mum's friend coming to our house. Mum told her about my problem and she suggested we saw Prof Dr Zabir @ Zubir at Beranang. This professor actually an expert in herbs and famous herbalist, because his kind of treatment been broadcasted in a documentary (or TV slot I can't remember). The friend of mum said his son having some illness in his private part and cured after consuming the herbs by this Prof. Before that he lose about RM20k (his money) and RM12k from company insurance to treat the illness in modern way. This Prof treat his patient at his house at Kg Sesapan Rembau, Beranang using his hand-made herbal capsule to treat a lot of illness like diabetes, cancer, hypertension, infertility and many more. The cost - fret not because you can put your payment in a special box provided there without any fixed charge- except for heart disease and cancer (if I'm not mistaken, from my reading) will cost about RM300 (because he have to import the special herb from foreign country). The treatment day is everyday from 9-5 except Wednesday and Friday.

We went there in Thursday but unfortunately the place is closed with no advance notice. I saw there are a lot of people coming to his house waiting for him, but after waited for 3 hours they went back and said it is not rizq. They came with various illness and some of them coming from far places like from Perak, Johol, JB and so on. We also went back and decided it was not my rizq after waiting for an hour. For those who want to try this herbs by this Prof Zabir, you can google his name and type Kg Sesapan Rembau in your GPS. It will lead you to Klinik Kesihatan Beranang and do ask the villagers there the house of this Prof. It maybe not my rizq but it maybe your rizq so do update if you happen to try his herbs.

How about my mum? She was dissapointed of course. I also told her that 2 months ago I used to order a health drink (it's like JMD or Atika Beauty) to promote the fertility and inner beauty. This health drink has press release in Utusan, I ordered a bottle from them and they promised to give the account number so that they can deliever the product to me, but the promise is gone with the wind. No rizq.

9th Raya and being childfree.

I changed again the blog theme. I love to play around with the blog theme and blogspot has offered quite a variety of beautiful template...